Presidents and Palm Trees: What to Take on a Desert Island

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The AP recently asked the presidential candidates what item they would want with them if they were stranded on a desert island. The answers, and their subtexts:

Democrats:

– Sen. Joe Biden: “Jill, my wife.” (“Someone has to be around to hear me talk.”)

– Sen. Hillary Clinton: “A good book.” (“I am unwilling to commit to any particular book. I will focus group Crime and Punishment versus Ulysses and get back to you.”)

– Sen. Chris Dodd: “Coffee with cream and sugar.” (“Why didn’t I choose water? Because I really love coffee. And because I am too short-sighted to be president.”)

John Edwards: “A book.” (“I don’t have time for this question.”)

Rep. Dennis Kucinich: His wife, Elizabeth. (“Have you seen my wife? You’d take her too.”)

Sen. Barack Obama: “Other than my wife and my kids, an inanimate object I would have to have would probably be a good book.” (“Please note, Hillary didn’t mention her family. I did.”)

Gov. Bill Richardson: “Blackberry and a Davidoff cigar.” (“I am an old-style political boss. I am the fattest of fat cats.”)

Republicans:

Sen. Sam Brownback: “Tarp.” (“I would surely be America’s most practical president.”) Ed. Note: Hahahahahaha. A tarp!

Rudy Giuliani: “Books and music.” (“If terrorists attacked my desert island’s palm tree, I would stand strong. 9/11. 9/11. 9/11 9/111/1/1/9/1/1//11.”)

Mike Huckabee: “Laptop with satellite reception.” (“I don’t understand the spirit of the question.”)

Rep. Duncan Hunter: “Mrs. Hunter.” (“I have strong family values, as proven by the fact that I awkwardly refuse to use my wife’s first name. I call her Mrs. Hunter at all times. However, in an ironic twist, I have left no one to care for our children.”)

Sen. John McCain: “Books.” (“I am a flip-flopper. In 2000, I chose sun-screen.”)

Mitt Romney: “My wife, Ann.” (“I’ll need something to eat, after all.”)

Rep. Tom Tancredo: “Boat.” (“I will be president because all the other candidates will be stuck on that damn island.”)

Spotted on Political Wire.

SIX TRUTHS

Reclaiming power from those who abuse it often starts with telling the truth. And in "This Is How Authoritarians Get Defeated," MoJo's Monika Bauerlein unpacks six truths to remember during the homestretch of an election where democracy, truth, and decency are on the line.

Truth #1: The chaos is the point.

Truth #2: Team Reality is bigger than it seems.

Truth #3: Facebook owns this.

Truth #4: When we go to work, we're in the fight.

Truth #5: It's about minority rule.

Truth #6: The only thing that can save us is…us.

Please take a moment to see how all these truths add up, because what happens in the weeks and months ahead will reverberate for at least a generation and we better be prepared.

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SIX TRUTHS

Reclaiming power from those who abuse it often starts with telling the truth. And in "This Is How Authoritarians Get Defeated," MoJo's Monika Bauerlein unpacks six truths to remember during the homestretch of an election where democracy, truth, and decency are on the line.

Truth #1: The chaos is the point.

Truth #2: Team Reality is bigger than it seems.

Truth #3: Facebook owns this.

Truth #4: When we go to work, we're in the fight.

Truth #5: It's about minority rule.

Truth #6: The only thing that can save us is…us.

Please take a moment to see how all these truths add up, because what happens in the weeks and months ahead will reverberate for at least a generation and we better be prepared.

And if you think journalism like Mother Jones'—that calls it like it is, that will never acquiesce to power, that looks where others don't—can help guide us through this historic, high-stakes moment, and you're able to right now, please help us reach our $350,000 goal by October 31 with a donation today. It's all hands on deck for democracy.

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