The Diddly Award

The Flightless Eagle Award is awarded to the right-wing congressional candidate least likely to soar. The nominees are…

Illustration: Peter Hoey

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Vernon Robinson (5th District, North Carolina), an African American Republican, is already legendary for his ads, such as the one in which he introduced himself this way: “Jesse Helms is back! And this time he’s black.” One pamphlet read: “Your vote could determine whether VERNON ROBINSON or my opponent — an admitted NUDIST — yep — like nekkid — like no clothes — represents the Republican Party.” Another ad reminded listeners how hard it is for liberals to admit that “black mothers need to stop having eight babies by seven different fathers, stop talking street-talk jive like ‘Yo, dawg, peep my bling-bling.’”

James Hart (8th District, Tennessee) is the GOP nominee who holds that “poverty genes of less ‘favored races’” will soon cause the U.S. to “look like one big Detroit.”

Alan Keyes (U.S. Senate, Illinois), who ran for the Senate in a state he’s never made his home, once railed against Hillary Clinton for doing the same: “I deeply resent the destruction of federalism represented by Hillary Clinton’s willingness to go into a state she doesn’t even live in and pretend to represent people there,” he said in 2000. “I certainly wouldn’t imitate it.” As the GOP’s candidate, Keyes quickly endeared himself to Illinois voters by advocating that their right to vote for their senators be revoked — and returned to the state legislature.

Tom Coburn (U.S. Senate, Oklahoma) had previously distinguished his hard-right positions by asserting: “If I wanted to buy a bazooka to use in a very restricted way, to do something, I ought to be able to do that.” This year he combined two hot-button issues into a surefire winner: “I favor the death penalty for abortionists and other people who take life.”

AND THE WINNER IS… Vernon Robinson, who also charged that gay marriage will lead to “civil unions for three men, then four or five, then two transvestites, a pedophile, a lesbian, and a partridge in a pear tree.”

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WHO DOESN’T LOVE A POSITIVE STORY—OR TWO?

“Great journalism really does make a difference in this world: it can even save kids.”

That’s what a civil rights lawyer wrote to Julia Lurie, the day after her major investigation into a psychiatric hospital chain that uses foster children as “cash cows” published, letting her know he was using her findings that same day in a hearing to keep a child out of one of the facilities we investigated.

That’s awesome. As is the fact that Julia, who spent a full year reporting this challenging story, promptly heard from a Senate committee that will use her work in their own investigation of Universal Health Services. There’s no doubt her revelations will continue to have a big impact in the months and years to come.

Like another story about Mother Jones’ real-world impact.

This one, a multiyear investigation, published in 2021, exposed conditions in sugar work camps in the Dominican Republic owned by Central Romana—the conglomerate behind brands like C&H and Domino, whose product ends up in our Hershey bars and other sweets. A year ago, the Biden administration banned sugar imports from Central Romana. And just recently, we learned of a previously undisclosed investigation from the Department of Homeland Security, looking into working conditions at Central Romana. How big of a deal is this?

“This could be the first time a corporation would be held criminally liable for forced labor in their own supply chains,” according to a retired special agent we talked to.

Wow.

And it is only because Mother Jones is funded primarily by donations from readers that we can mount ambitious, yearlong—or more—investigations like these two stories that are making waves.

About that: It’s unfathomably hard in the news business right now, and we came up about $28,000 short during our recent fall fundraising campaign. We simply have to make that up soon to avoid falling further behind than can be made up for, or needing to somehow trim $1 million from our budget, like happened last year.

If you can, please support the reporting you get from Mother Jones—that exists to make a difference, not a profit—with a donation of any amount today. We need more donations than normal to come in from this specific blurb to help close our funding gap before it gets any bigger.

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