Wanted: Someone, Anyone, to Play at This Big Boy’s Party

Adele, Harry Styles, and Elton John have all reportedly declined an invitation to perform at King Charles’ coronation.

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Preparations are underway for King Charles’ coronation, a lavish affair that’s expected to see the only G-7 economy likely headed for a recession this year dig deep into taxpayer funds to host an anachronistic pageant honoring hereditary rule.

If that doesn’t smack of a grand old time to you, well, you’re in good company. Some of the United Kingdom’s biggest stars, including Adele, Harry Styles, Elton John, the Spice Girls, and Ed Sheeran have all reportedly declined invitations to perform at Charles’ big day. The House of Windsor is now scrambling to find someone—anyone—to headline the royal gig.

What’s behind the apparent snubs? Well, that’s a bit of a Rorschach test. You could easily see why the likes of Adele and Harry Styles could be allergic to a wasteful event that’s bound to see atrocious blokes like Jeremy Clarkson among the high-profile guests. Seen from another angle, perhaps they’re Meghan Markle supporters. Or maybe they simply want to steer clear of that drama altogether. Either way, they’re Adele and Harry Styles; they certainly have better things to do. As for Elton, I’m not sure why the royals would think to reach out to the close friend of Princess Diana to play at a ceremony partly honoring the woman that made her life hell

“I wouldn’t quite panic yet,” Christopher Andersen, a royal biographer, told Fox News in a write-up teeming with various excuses for why people may be turning down Charles’ big day, including a random mention of Adele’s back pain. “There is also a long list of American pop stars chomping at the bit to perform,” Andersen insisted, pointing to Alicia Keys and Diana Ross as previous examples of Americans who performed for Charles’ mummy. 

Sure, I guess I could see a world where Taylor Swift ends up playing the gig; “London Boy” points to exactly that kind of torment. But here’s to hoping we Americans rise above any Anglophile affliction we might possess—and keep relishing a monarchy in shambles.

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WHO DOESN’T LOVE A POSITIVE STORY—OR TWO?

“Great journalism really does make a difference in this world: it can even save kids.”

That’s what a civil rights lawyer wrote to Julia Lurie, the day after her major investigation into a psychiatric hospital chain that uses foster children as “cash cows” published, letting her know he was using her findings that same day in a hearing to keep a child out of one of the facilities we investigated.

That’s awesome. As is the fact that Julia, who spent a full year reporting this challenging story, promptly heard from a Senate committee that will use her work in their own investigation of Universal Health Services. There’s no doubt her revelations will continue to have a big impact in the months and years to come.

Like another story about Mother Jones’ real-world impact.

This one, a multiyear investigation, published in 2021, exposed conditions in sugar work camps in the Dominican Republic owned by Central Romana—the conglomerate behind brands like C&H and Domino, whose product ends up in our Hershey bars and other sweets. A year ago, the Biden administration banned sugar imports from Central Romana. And just recently, we learned of a previously undisclosed investigation from the Department of Homeland Security, looking into working conditions at Central Romana. How big of a deal is this?

“This could be the first time a corporation would be held criminally liable for forced labor in their own supply chains,” according to a retired special agent we talked to.

Wow.

And it is only because Mother Jones is funded primarily by donations from readers that we can mount ambitious, yearlong—or more—investigations like these two stories that are making waves.

About that: It’s unfathomably hard in the news business right now, and we came up about $28,000 short during our recent fall fundraising campaign. We simply have to make that up soon to avoid falling further behind than can be made up for, or needing to somehow trim $1 million from our budget, like happened last year.

If you can, please support the reporting you get from Mother Jones—that exists to make a difference, not a profit—with a donation of any amount today. We need more donations than normal to come in from this specific blurb to help close our funding gap before it gets any bigger.

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