Stephen Colbert Revives “Stephen Colbert” to Defend Michelle Wolf

“Being mad at her for doing her job is like accusing the valet of briefly stealing your car.”

If you haven’t seen Stephen Colbert’s legendary 2006 White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner appearance where, playing his right-wing blowhard character “Stephen Colbert,” he roasts President George W. Bush to his face, then stop reading and immediately go to the bottom of this post and watch the whole thing. We’ll wait. It’s amazing.

If you have seen it, you’ll know there’s no one better to come to the defense of Michelle Wolf, the Daily Show alum who provoked glee, outrage, and an endless cycle of news-takes ever since she headlined DC’s Saturday night “nerd prom.” Most notably, Wolf was criticized (and praised) after she compared White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders to “Aunt Lydia,” the anti-feminist villain of The Handmaid’s Tale, calling her an “Uncle Tom, but for white women who disappoint other white women.” Wolf also joked that Sanders used the ashes of burned facts for eye makeup.

Colbert received a similar (albeit pre-Twitter) level of invective and controversy after his own performance 12 years ago. And so on Monday night’s The Late Show with Stephen Colbert on CBS, Colbert switched up his eyeglasses, camera angles, and attitude to give viewers some pure vintage The Colbert Show-style Colbert.

“Look, you didn’t like it? You have that right,” Colbert said. “Don’t invite her back again—but grow a pair. This is a roast and you’re the ones who hired Michelle Wolf! Being mad at her for doing her job is like accusing the valet of briefly stealing your car.”

“Stop acting like you’re surprised,” he continued. “I thought news people did research, but you’re telling me you couldn’t spend 90 seconds on YouTube to find out what her act was like? As a great man once said: fake news.”

 

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WHO DOESN’T LOVE A POSITIVE STORY—OR TWO?

“Great journalism really does make a difference in this world: it can even save kids.”

That’s what a civil rights lawyer wrote to Julia Lurie, the day after her major investigation into a psychiatric hospital chain that uses foster children as “cash cows” published, letting her know he was using her findings that same day in a hearing to keep a child out of one of the facilities we investigated.

That’s awesome. As is the fact that Julia, who spent a full year reporting this challenging story, promptly heard from a Senate committee that will use her work in their own investigation of Universal Health Services. There’s no doubt her revelations will continue to have a big impact in the months and years to come.

Like another story about Mother Jones’ real-world impact.

This one, a multiyear investigation, published in 2021, exposed conditions in sugar work camps in the Dominican Republic owned by Central Romana—the conglomerate behind brands like C&H and Domino, whose product ends up in our Hershey bars and other sweets. A year ago, the Biden administration banned sugar imports from Central Romana. And just recently, we learned of a previously undisclosed investigation from the Department of Homeland Security, looking into working conditions at Central Romana. How big of a deal is this?

“This could be the first time a corporation would be held criminally liable for forced labor in their own supply chains,” according to a retired special agent we talked to.

Wow.

And it is only because Mother Jones is funded primarily by donations from readers that we can mount ambitious, yearlong—or more—investigations like these two stories that are making waves.

About that: It’s unfathomably hard in the news business right now, and we came up about $28,000 short during our recent fall fundraising campaign. We simply have to make that up soon to avoid falling further behind than can be made up for, or needing to somehow trim $1 million from our budget, like happened last year.

If you can, please support the reporting you get from Mother Jones—that exists to make a difference, not a profit—with a donation of any amount today. We need more donations than normal to come in from this specific blurb to help close our funding gap before it gets any bigger.

payment methods

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