False Positives

The 10 best excuses given by athletes busted for doping.

Photo of Roger Clemens: Wikimedia Commons

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ATHLETE

WHAT HE SAID CAUSED THE POSITIVE RESULT

Tour de France winner Floyd Landis

Too much Jack Daniel’s

Czech tennis player Petr Korda

Veal dinner

Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson

Sarsaparilla-and-ginseng energy drink

American sprinter Dennis Mitchell

5 beers and 4 sex acts the night before the race

SF Giants slugger Barry Bonds

Flaxseed oil

Pitcher Roger Clemens

Lidocaine and vitamin B12

British shot-putter Paul Edwards

Drinking a bottle of shampoo (seriously)

Tennis champ Andre Agassi

Drinking his assistant’s meth-spiked soda

Italian soccer player Marco Borriello

Rubbing STD medicine on himself

Olympic cyclist Tyler Hamilton

A “vanishing twin” absorbed into his mother’s womb. (Don’t ask.)

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REAL QUICK, REAL URGENT

Minority rule, corruption, disinformation, attacks on those who dare tell the truth: There is a direct line from what's happening in Russia and Ukraine to what's happening here at home. And that's what MoJo's Monika Bauerlein writes about in "Their Fight Is Our Fight" to unpack the information war we find ourselves in and share a few examples to show why the power of independent, reader-supported journalism is such a threat to authoritarians.

Corrupt leaders the world over can (and will) try to shut down the truth, but when the truth has millions of people on its side, you can't keep it down for good. And there's no more powerful or urgent argument for your support of Mother Jones' journalism right now than that. We need to raise about $450,000 to hit our online fundraising budget in these next few months, so please read more from Monika and pitch in if you can.

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